November 15, 2008

As I began preparing myself to staff the November Woman Within weekend in the days before, it was very apparent that I was feeling unsettled and disconnected. As I tried to draw myself in, it became more and more apparent to me that I was distracted because so many of my loved ones were experiencing troubles for a variety of reasons and I knew there wasn't really anything I could do to help them. Everything they had to work on had to be done in their time and in their way, yet I didn't seem able to let it go.

As I was driving to Delavan, I knew that I had to find a way to leave that all behind so that I could focus on the work ahead. I looked to the sky to find meaning and ways to connect myself to what was to come. The first thing I noticed was that the clouds were low and full. It felt as if the heavens were coming closer to help us build the container for the weekend. Soon after, I saw a flock of geese flying in formation. I remembered the story of the geese and how they work as a team, sometimes leading, sometimes following, but always sharing their energy, and I thought of the symbolism of the team of women I would staff with.

Sometime later, I saw a lone seagull flying and I thought of Jonathan Livingston Seagull. I connected that image to each woman who would come that weekend to take their own daring flight. At the same time, I was driving down a long country road and I realized that, although there will be much support given and received this weekend, our individual journeys are most often alone.

I saw that the colors of autumn were still vibrant and I remembered waking up a few weeks ago thinking how beautiful the fall was and that God must have been busy with His paintbrush as I slept. I felt grateful for the beauty and crispness of the day.

As I approached the last several miles before the end of my journey that day, the sun came out just on the horizon and provided a sense of warmth and a beautiful and vivid double rainbow appeared that stayed with me for the rest of the trip. A rainbow symbolizes hope to me and I was immediately struck with the thought of the riches we will all be blessed with at the end of the weekend. I was filled with a powerful love and said to myself, "Yes! It's good to be alive!"

I was ready.

I have to say that the one-team weekend was very powerful! I think the staff kept the energy up exceptionally well, partly because we were not divided as we would have been on a two-team weekend. The day was long on Saturday, but the work of the women was as powerful in the end as it was in the beginning. It was a very rewarding experience and I was grateful to have been a part of it.

Each time I have had to say the words, "The thing I fear most telling you about myself is..." I always answer the same way -- I answer that I have a very difficult time connecting with others. It was not lost on me that I was called to do a connection piece with a participant this past weekend. Few things in my life have been as healing to me as the moment I had to find from within myself what this woman needed from me to connect with her. I'm sure I got as much out of the giving as I hope she did in the receiving. I also had the profound realization throughout the weekend that I felt very connected to the women I staffed with and clearly felt that this community of women has welcomed me in and made a place for me. I laughed out loud with tears in my eyes as I realized that I can never say again that I struggle with feeling connected to others.

At the end of the weekend, I was given a stone to pass along to someone who has given me a great gift as a way of thanking them. There was no question in my mind that my stone will go to the woman who gave me the Woman Within brochure three years ago. I held the brochure for all of those years and went back to it periodically and knew that one day I would attend. When I learned that she would be moving away and would no longer be in my life, I knew that the time had come and I had to find a way to go on the weekend. My life has changed profoundly because of that gift and because of that one very special woman that I have been blessed to know.

On the way home from the weekend, my mind kept going back to the words, "How will your life be different... now that you have found a place...?"


Lessons from Geese
by Milton Olson adapted by Angeles Arrien

Fact: As each goose flaps its wings it creates an "uplift" for the birds that follow. By flying in a "V" formation, the whole flock adds 71% greater flying range than if each bird flew alone.
Lesson 1: People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going quicker and easier because they are traveling on the thrust of one another.

Fact: When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of flying alone. It quickly moves back into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in front of it.
Lesson 2: If we have as much sense as a goose we stay in formation with those headed where we want to go. We are willing to accept their help and give our help to others.

Fact: When the lead goose tires, it rotates back into the formation and another goose flies to the point position.
Lesson 3: It pays to take turns doing the hard tasks and sharing leadership. As with geese, people are interdependent on each other's skills, capabilities and unique arrangements of gifts, talents or resources.

Fact: The geese flying in formation honk to encourage those up front to keep up their speed.
Lesson 4: We need to make sure our honking is encouraging. In groups where there is encouragement, the production is much greater. The power of encouragement (to stand by one's heart or core values and encourage the heart and core of others) is the quality of honking we seek.

Fact: When a goose gets sick, wounded or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and follow it down to help and protect it. They stay with it until it dies or is able to fly again. Then, they launch out with another formation or catch up with the flock.
Lesson 5: If we have as much sense as geese, we will stand by each other in difficult times as well as when we are strong.

Blessings,
Ginny Borolov
Michigan City, IN
(WWTW, Toddhall Retreat, Columbia, IL. June 2008)
gborolov@sbcglobal.net