This Dreamer's Story

Since the beginning of the idea of me, I have been dolphin – ocean-dweller, air-breather.
Not fish, who lives and breathes in water.
Nor bird, who lives and breathes in air.
Rather some paradox, some tangled form whose essence is two realms interwoven.
I was conceived in the world of spirit and will return there;
I swim nowhere but in the ocean, yet I cannot fill my lungs with it,
for I am – in this phase of my journey – dependent on the material world.
To finish my work here I must hold focus,
resign myself gracefully to this dependence and not lament it,
Use it to keep me humble and grounded, remembering always to be grateful
for the life-affirming urge to visit the surface.

Each separate dream of each separate being on each separate night is an expedition by itself
And all are threaded together to become nothing more than one instant in God’s ancient dream.
In the first scene of the first act in the play of my life, I found my Lord, the Best-Beloved
And I – still so unaware – heard with inner ear the whispering of His voice
And knew with a certainty that had no beginning or end what God dreamed for me.
He has dreamed that I am designed for the work of unity.
He has fashioned my soul to reflect His Name the All-Connecting
Has molded my heart to sing His Name the All-Embracing
Has shaped my will to proclaim His Name the All-Loving
Every wave and current and tide since my earth-birth has moved me in this direction.

Hundreds and thousands are the lovers who have pulled me,
Uncountable the whims of the universe that have tweaked my path.
To name every one I would have to write word upon word upon page upon page
Until I am too old and tired to hold a pen.
To condense them onto one leaf, gather them all into a single symbol,
Is a job for someone more perseverant than I.
For I am only dolphin, and I have much work still to do.
How can I write when I’m swimming?
How can I swim when I’m breathing?
How can I breathe when my longing
Drags me drowning into the sea?

Phyllis Unterschuetz
(WWTW Sept. 2007 Delavan)
twowings@earthlink.net