Ask Crone OTD: by Judith Pauly

Dear Crone Judith:

My question is: when is humor appropriate and when can it be a distraction, especially on the weekend. I see you use it often in your workshops and on the carpet. While I love it I am afraid to use it for fear of being criticized.

"Wanting to laugh and not sure."

Dear Wanting to laugh and not sure,

I believe humor,when used appropriately is healing. There have been scientific studies conducted to prove this with people who have health issues and depression. I use humor as a way to connect as a woman, spiritual being and human.

I believe, one of the greatest gifts we give ourselves and others is to be able to laugh at our being human and to acknowledge our connection.

For example, A woman has shared a deep, deep painful experience. There may be consoling words AND, the truth is when I acknowledge her pain by saying "that sucks" or some other irreverant phrase she feels heard and connected. It is a simple technic used in NLP, Neuro Linguistic Programming where we shift the vibrational energy by getting her out of the exquisite pain for at least a minute and NOT discounting it.

Humor is not appropriate when it is passive aggressive, demeaning, shaming or sarcastic. It is not helpful when it distracts or discounts. When humor comes spontaneously from a place of connection and to show the absurdity of a situation, it blesses.

SOULUTION: USE IT WITH LOVE AND THE WORLD WILL BE A BETTER PLACE.

Crone Judith, Older Than Dirt

Dear Crone Judith:

Why does shame always come back? For a long time after I have done work on shame, I feel good and shame free but it eventually comes back. What can I do to get rid of it once and for all?

"Feeling Yucky"

Dear Feeling Jucky,

BUMMER!!! This is why I call Shame the “TRICKSTER”. It pops up out of nowhere often to create havoc. Well there is good news and bad news with shame. Bad news . . .it is cellular and wants attention above everything and everyone else. It disconnects us from our SOUL It discounts our connection with the Divine source. We all have what we need to be in connection with all that is good and Shame causes us to forget this.

The good news is . . . Shame can be our friend when we acknowledge it, check it out and let it know we will take action. Another word for Shame is the conscience. It is related to the soul and lets us know when we are out of integrity. However, when the EGO is involved, shame takes over and we feel yucky. The EGO tells us we are flawed.

Soulution . . . Check it out. Where does it come from? Is it old stuff? How has it served you? Does it serve you now? Can you do something about it?

If you can do something about it DO IT NOW. If not, release the shame and let it go with love. Tell someone about it. Look in the mirror and check in with your soul, your essence, your heart. Spirituality can be fun so laugh at your self.

Forgiveness is the heart of the soul.

Blessings, OTD

Judith Pauly, "Older Than Dirt" www.PaulySoulStuff.com Email: JKPSOUL@PaulySoulStuff.com 312.952.7896 Ask OTD is a regular monthly Heartbeat column. Send in your questions to OTD at JKPSOUL@PaulySoulStuff.com

Judith Pauly (Crone OTD)