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Have you ever been told “Do your
work” around the isms? What does that mean?
As a white person it’s difficult for me to
understand what women of color need in order to feel
safe. However I do know about sexism and what men
need to do so that I feel safe. I have come to
believe that whenever one learns about one ism, the
awareness around other isms increases.
I asked my friend, Erva Baden, who teaches classes
on women’s history and feminine spirituality to
share some of her thoughts about the meaning of “Do
Your Own Work” in regards to sexism.
If a man wants to do his work on sexism he needs to:
-
Be aware of how much he’s not aware.
-
Have the willingness and courage to go looking
for that which he’s not aware.
-
Be aware of sexist behavior (jokes, standing too
close, touching a woman without permission) and how
rampant sexist behaviors are in advertising and the
media.
-
Encourage his daughters that they are capable of
doing anything they want to do.
-
Teach his daughters how to stay safe in a sexist
culture.
-
Be willing to listen when women talk, to not
dismiss what women say, to ask questions, to be
interested, to not automatically give advice.
-
Read about women’s history, especially the impact
of the burning times.
-
Acknowledge the impact on women of a male god.
-
Move from rescuing women to being supportive and
to asking a woman what she needs.
-
Get rid of the idea that certain jobs, whether
career or at home, belong to a woman because she’s a
woman.
-
Become aware of male privilege.
-
Set aside his defensiveness
It may be easy for women to nod and agree that men
need to take the above actions. What happens if we
go through this list and change the subject to
racism and state what white people need to do? Try
on these suggestions. If a white person wants to do
her/his work on raciism s/he needs to:
Be aware of how much we are not aware. - Have the willingness and courage to go looking
for that which we are not aware.
Read about the history of African Americans and
other people of color, especially of beatings, lynchings, Jim Crow laws and the continuing impact
today.
Have no tolerance for telling or listening to
racist jokes.
Acknowledge the impact of a white god, white
dolls, white standards of beauty.
Learn about the impact of statements such as: “I
don’t see you as black.”
Learn that it’s not enough to have a good heart;
that our intent may have a different impact than we
expected or wanted.
Do an Isms and Issues one-day workshop. Join the
Multicultural Council listserv where we wrestle with
the learnings from the I & I.
-
Become aware of white privilege.
-
Set aside our defensiveness
And specifically for our Woman Within
weekend---look to the cultural make-up of the
weekend and how that impacts the participants.
We could go through the list with each of the isms
--- heterosexism, classism, physical ability,
religion, level of education, country of origin and
find that we need more awareness in each of these
areas.
Doing your work is about building awareness and
understanding of how our differences impact our
relationships and keep us from each other. It can be
like stumbling around in the forest, bumping into
trees, making mistakes, and sometimes seeing the
light between the branches. Surely it is a journey
worth taking for women and men who want to make the
world a safer place for children of all ages.
Louise Lovdahl
Heartbeat Roving Reporter
(WWTW) Delavan, WI,
October 1993
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